Charlie Ryder
A London Irish Story as told to Matthew Dunne-Miles
“I was in the same year at school as Sadiq Khan and it’s great to see what a role model he is for so many people. We’re proud of how he went from being the local MP through to becoming Mayor.”
"I'm from Tooting, Southwest London. There's a comedy called Citizen Smith and at the beginning the title character would stand outside Tooting Broadway and shout ‘power to the people!’ – that put us on the map. I love the mix of people here and growing up with those from different countries and nationalities around. My neighbour, in her 90s, is from Guyana and we call her ‘Aunty’. I was in the same year at school as Sadiq Khan and it’s great to see what a role model he is for so many people. We're proud of how he went from being the local MP through to becoming Mayor.
My Mum is from County Fermanagh, Northern Ireland and my dad was born in Westport, County Mayo. I think that Irish people really connected with people from different countries because of similar experiences being immigrants.
My parents met at a dance in the 60s, got married, bought a place with a grant from the GLC, and had three children. They've always kept a connection to their Irishness, they would go down to the Irish shop to buy soda bread, orange lemonade, biscuits, and Barry's tea.
My Dad suffered from alcoholism. I think he suffered moving away from Ireland and got into the drinking culture. I found a 12-step fellowship called Al-Anon, for relatives of alcoholics, which helped me heal and come to a place of forgiveness. Before he died, I was able to hold his hand and tell him I loved him. It was the only time I remember being able to do that. Now, I can say there was kindness from my Dad – he gave me pocket money, there were Christmas presents there, he loved snooker, football, cycling, and fishing. He missed Ireland.
"My Dad suffered from alcoholism. I think he suffered moving away from Ireland and got into the drinking culture.
I found a 12-step fellowship called Al-Anon, for relatives of alcoholics, which helped me heal and come to a place of forgiveness."
I'm really proud of my Irish roots. When I was younger, I was good at running. I represented London at the Cross-Country Championships and came 76th. While I was wearing a London vest, I was also wearing a shamrock on my shorts.
I also used to play lacrosse and helped develop Ireland’s lacrosse team. We played in the European Championships, and I was the captain. Now I've stepped back but I was just happy to see it develop. There was a moving article about how Ireland gave up their spot in the 2020 World Lacrosse Championships for the Iroquois team to play instead. The Iroquois team weren’t able to play because their nation status wasn’t recognised, but it's their sport and lacrosse is Native American in its roots, so Ireland stepped aside. Even if I contributed to that in some way without anything else, I have a pride in that.
“I also used to play lacrosse and helped develop Ireland’s lacrosse team. We played in the European Championships, and I was the captain.
Now I've stepped back but I was just happy to see it develop.”
In the 1990s, I was involved in a demonstration against the British National Party. They had a bookshop in Welling, Southeast London. There had recently been three racist murders and 50,000 of us marched to shut the bookshop down. At the front of the demonstration, were family members of people that had been murdered.
We were met by riot police who were protecting the headquarters. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time and part of me was so angry about what had happened to these young people. I lost my temper and was throwing bricks at the riot shields. Not long afterwards the police came to my house and arrested me. I waited two years to be sentenced and was sent to prison for 16 months.
While I was waiting to be sentenced, I volunteered at a holiday for people with disabilities. I met a policewoman paralysed from a different riot and I asked them “Do you hate the person that did this to you?". She replied "No, because there's too much hate in the world.".
When I was released from prison, I turned the experience into a one man play and took it to the Edinburgh Fringe. I had to physically do different characters, so I took a puppetry workshop at Little Angel Theatre in Islington and made a little marionette. There was such joy in making them.
I started to think beyond my own story, so I made a documentary about people who have experienced trauma and use art to heal. I started to collaborate with other people from around the world and it was just beautiful being able to tell these stories. Puppetry is a really beautiful art form.
I'm now a carer for my mum, who has dementia, and I also work with a charity supporting people in the community who are nonverbal. I take them on walks, on trains, or to art classes. It is challenging work but there's a joy as well.
I could be working with someone who maybe just says a few words, but you know those words are probably more than most people say."
For more information on the services offered by Al-Anon, for the family and friends of those with alcohol issues, please visit: www.al-nonuk-org.uk
